To Kyle Forester Reese Carlson... I pray I will see you again...

I cant feel your pain, I'm to far to touch.
But I can experiance my own sadness,
now a bit to much,
I knew you only though words and dreaming,
Never more than a silent thought,
But somehow I knew you, more than a stranger,
I loved you as a friend, as one being of identical heart.
Someone who I can never touch, but have touched just the same.

I cant save your from you self, from your demons or your dreams,
I cant take away your sorrow, or your pains and torments.
I can only send you my heart, packaged in a silent wish,
For you I would trade my very soul, if it was to save my friend.
I'd give you every ounce of happiness that I possess, if only to see you smile.
Even just once.

Please dont give up on me, dont just run from the things you hate,
Death is not the answer, but I fear I am to late...
If perhaps in your dreams, you see me and I cry.
Would that be enough to save you? Please dont die....
I've relied on you, so many times, to help me with my problems,
to dry my teary eyes, but now in the time when you needed me the most...
I was gone, some where to far, and you were left alone...

Please forgive me dear one, forgive my fatal error, But please,
come back, dont leave me hear, to face my fears alone, I love you friend,
dont go away, I need you. Dont you know?
....I love you Kyle...more than life... I love you... please dont go....

"Chained"

This is a picture I am in love with. She got a bit messed up in the scanner...but still looks smexily goth!

Too lazy for long discriptians.... weee!

"A Penitence For An Unforgiveable Sin" ~Part II of 'Sad Angel And The Sea"~

Note: If You have not read Sad Angel And The Sea, please read it before progressing onto this one, they are ment to be read that way. Thanks Much.

He stood silent on the whispering, white sands, over looking the now dark horizon he had seen so many times before. Alien somehow, now that he stood on the land to gaze out at it. The soft song of the sea called out for him to return, to take up sail once more and journey thru her never ending black satin billows. The ache in his heart urged him to find a new ship to man, with a new captain to sail under, pleaded with him to taste the salt and feel the mist once again. But the remorse in his soul ate away at his body, he feared returning to his beloved sea, he feared repeating his sins. The wind began to roll out to sea, sweeping up from behind him, his slightly matted, and tangled, dark rust-colored hair took to the wind in long, waving strips like a ship’s flag on a solemn day. Bit by bit, pieces of it waved and then were caught up into the blood emitting from his face, almost as things caught up by the lace of a spiders web. The wound, still fresh enough to bleed on all accounts, glistened in the soft moonlight as the blood seeped from it. A long cut, it ran along the right of his face in the slight form of a crescent moon, from the temple it had started, pulled along his cheek and down till the knife had slipped off his jaw slightly beneath his chapped lips. The pain had long since left his face, years of numbness from the splash of the sea had taken his feeling away many years ago, but what pain had diminished from his weathered face slowly crept into his heart. The images still played in his mind, over and over again, each time they would repeat he fell deeper into despair.

That night the black sea rolled with a lust for blood, lightning split the skies into halves of impenetrable darkness with its sudden burst of blinding light, and thunder billowed out a low warning for all who dared to brave the treacherous seas. The ship’s old, worn wood creaked and protested as wave after fierce black wave bombarded its aged sides, causing it to rock back and forth like a small cradle. The deck moved and dipped, swallowing water and flooding as it did, and the wet and wild wind tore at the experienced sails with unseen claws, shredding the fine cloth. The ship and crew had only just set out, in all under an hour before, though the faint gleam from the lighthouse was hardly noticeable though the ominous storm. The ship continued to rock and sway, as the handsome young captain stood boldly at the helm, his white teeth gritted to the wind and rain as he tried in a vain attempt to regain control over his vessel. The second man, himself, had run up the stairs unstably as the boat lurched, shouting over the wind to the captain. Telling him they needed to turn around, the men all wanted to go back, they could make it back, but if they kept sailing the sea would surly kill them all. The brave young captain looked to his trusted friend and first mate with an adventurous gleam in his eye, and yelled back over the waves.
"Poseidon himself cannot take this boat! She’ll hold thru the storm, like she had done for so many others!"

"My friend! Don't be a fool! You are sentencing us to our deaths!"

"Nonsense! We’ll conquer this storm by morning!" The dashing young captain managed a smile at his friend and continued, "Now go tell the men to be in good spirits, we’ll make it! We have to! By GOD we must!"

What happened in the moments after that, he couldn’t quite recall, but half the crew had decided that the captain had lost his mind and that they had agreed on mutiny. He had rejected to the idea, but the cold feel of a metal blade against his throat and the fear of death by the cold sea, was enough to convince him to betray the only friend he had ever had. Almost in a blur the fight began, those loyal battling against those who were not. He ran up to the helm where his courageous friend stood, the captain looked at him with a worried yet trusting smile, and the man’s hands began to shake.

"My friend!" The Captain shouted, "I’m glad to see you have not given way to the poisonous words of the others, You know we will make it!"

"No, My friend!" He shook his head with a sorrowful frown, "Captain! They are right! We will die if we stay in this sea of demise! Please my friend! Listen to reason! Turn back now! Please!"

"You’re as crazy as the rest of them! We’ll not turn back! We will survive!"

In an instant the fear and panic had grabbed him, he hadn't ment to but he lunged at his friend, thinking if only to restrain him so they could make it back to the harbor before they all drown. However, in an unfortunate misinterpretation of his actions, the now frightened young captain drew his dagger from its sheath at his side and swung towards his friend. The glittering silver of the dagger caught his skin and tore along his face like a cat’s claw, and he stumbled back screaming out in pain and shock. His thoughts turning to betrayal and anger, as the captain went to slice him again the ship took a violent heave throwing him off balance, as he stumbled the bleeding man drew his own dagger and went in for revenge. Blood for blood. The sea did not want the small amount of blood he had been planning to offer, the same payment as his own. It lusted for life, and struck the ship again causing him to blunder in his aim and the dagger sank into the captain’s chest. Lightning split the sky, as the handsome young man sank to his knees, gripping the hilt of the dagger, which was piercing his dying heart.

There were words shared between them in a single moment before his only friend had died in his seafarer’s arms. He was not the one who sailed the ship back to the port, in stead he had remained on the deck cradling the lifeless body of his friend and captain, sobbing and begging for forgiveness. As they returned to land he had disappeared, fearful for his life, it was this same night. And now here he stood, on this pail white beach, his last promise to his friend, the handsome young captain. He had promised to go to the beach with the white sands and the grass that cut like thorns, he had promised that he would take care of the captain’s treasure. Though he didn't know what it was he had promised to take care of. But, even if it were Lucifer himself, He would stay true to the dying wishes of his friend. Praying that it would be penitence enough for the terrible sin he had committed, he hoped it would help to cleanse the innocent blood from his hands… Somehow he doubted it would.